Who are you trying to impress?
With the American mentality the way it is, living within your means is especially challenging. Everyone is trying to compete with the Jones’. They buy a new home and then you get to thinking that your home is isn’t big enough anymore. They buy a new car and then you feel like you have to buy a better one. Not only is it hard to keep up and compete, there is also pressure that you need to make these decisions right now no matter if you have the funds saved up for them or not. This can turn into one slippery slope really fast, without you even realizing you’re on the hill. It just seems natural and the way of our culture to always be getting new things and keeping up with the latest trends.
Now after saying all that, “Who are you trying to impress”? Honestly. I’m not trying to be rude at all but I think everyone needs to answer that question when it comes to material things. I struggle with this a lot, as my husband will attest to. I would love to have a new car. (a new Saturn Sky to be exact) I also would like to revamp my closet. By that I mean go on a shopping spree to buy clothes that are more in style then what I have now. A friend of mine always dresses great and has the new trends when it comes to clothing. I would love to be her and be able to afford those things. Sometimes I even feel inferior because I don’t have everything she does. But, if we are really that great of friends do I need them for her to still like me? Who am I trying to impress? The clothes, the cars, the houses, do not matter. In the end those things will be meaningless and trivial.
How can you handle it when the urge comes to try to keep up with your peers?
1.) Don’t ever let anyone pressure you. It’s the way of our culture to make you feel like you have to make a decision right now, and you have to purchase that car right now. That simply is not the case. I would also argue that all those people you are trying to keep up with, aren’t as well off as they make it out to be. I have found this to be the case more often then not. Yeah, they bought the new car, but are they really happy about that decision later down the road when the high monthly car payment get overwhelming? Probably not. That’s why it is SO important to really think long and hard before buying a big ticket item. If you give it a month, I would bet that you wouldn’t even want that item any more.
2.) Answer the question, “why do I want it”? If the answer is because the Jones’ bought it, DON’T GET IT! That is not a good reason by any stretch of the imagination. That’s like when you ask a child why they did something and they respond with, “everyone else was doing it”. It didn’t work with your parents when you were a child and it doesn’t hold water as an adult either.
3.) Consult your checking account: This one should be obvious but there are a lot of people who just assume that they can afford the monthly payments without really checking how much money is in their account first. Whenever you’re making a big purchase it is vital to know realistically if you can afford it or not. And when I say afford, I mean that you have the money up front to pay for it. (Unless you’re buying a house. Then I would encourage you to save 20% for the down payment.) Most people will put it on their credit cards and take for granted that they can keep up with the payments when they really can’t. That then starts the downward spiral. If you miss a payment or are late you are socked with fees and interest. If you couldn’t afford it in the beginning with “normal” payments, what makes you think you can afford it with extra interest added on top?
I understand that this is something that is hard to deal with. Many Americans go into debt for this very reason; trying to compete with what everyone seems to have. But, this really does get out of control really fast. If you are married, this can be especially difficult. If you started buying outside of your means, you quickly discover you are way over your heads without a way out. When both people are stressed out about finances and how to cover just their basic bills, it starts to cause major issues within the marriage. If this scenario describes you then seek help. Look for a volunteer financial adviser, a pastor, or trustworthy friend who is good with finances.
[...] topic also ties in with a previous artical that I wrote entitled, “who are you trying to impress”. In that I talked about living up to the worlds standards on the things that we should have. You [...]
[...] talked about this previously. She would love to be driving around in a black Saturn Sky with the top down. She is currently driving a 1998 Honda Civic with very low mileage which is paid [...]